Notice Me
by CrazyTalk32
Summary: Lorraine DeAmico makes one mistake and her whole life changes when she's assigned a mission that she doesn't have the courage to do... yet.
1. The Beginning

**ALL POETRY IN THIS FANFICTION, UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE, WAS WRITTEN AND BELONGS TO ME. YOU MAY NOT USE IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. **

**Disclaimer: All things from the Harry Potter books in this fanfiction do not belong to me. They belong to J. K. Rowling.**

_Running faster than ever,  
__Having no fun at all.  
__Lies surround her;  
__They drown her.  
__No longer feeling that small._

Rainy ran farther and farther, deeper and deeper into the forest. Blood and tears were dripping down her face, which was mostly covered with her black hair that she had grown so tired of with throughout her life. She couldn't stand it any longer; the knowledge of being a murderer was burning inside her. It was killing her. She had to go back. She had to change history.

4 Months Ago 

It was all too much now. She couldn't stand it. She was going back for her seventh year of Hogwarts soon, but now she wasn't sure whether or not she would want to. What was the point? She already had her OWLs, so what was the point of getting her NEWTs? And it wasn't like anybody would miss her. All she had was that little group of friends, who probably didn't like her that much anyway.

Lorraine DeAmico was the same age as a group of people in her year, known as the Marauders. They were known by everyone in the school, and liked by most people. There were four of them. There was Sirius Black- known for his good looks, sense of humor, and many past girlfriends, James Potter- Sirius's best friend, known for his good looks (not as good as Sirius's though), being the chaser and captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team and his sense of humor, Remus Lupin- smart, also good looking but not as good as Potter or Black, and a prefect, and Peter Pettigrew- small, blonde, and funny-.

By the end of her 6th year, Lorraine had come to the conclusion that she wasn't ever going to get noticed by anybody unless she did something. The Marauders were almost legends, and they were the complete opposite of her.

Her friends had always said to not be so scared, but she really couldn't help it.

_Invisible and silent,_  
_Going by unnoticed,_  
_Needs some help,_  
_But air's the closest._

She had to be at Kings' Cross soon, so she grabbed her trunk and stuffed it into a backpack that had a charm on it that made it fit more things in it. Lorraine shuffled out of her house and walked down the street. Her town was practically empty. There were almost no ways to entertain people there, and there was garbage all over all the grass. The roads were old and were practically falling apart.

_Empty and lonely,_  
_Like a ghost town,_  
_Not really homely,_  
_Makes people frown._

Lorraine slowly walked down on the old sidewalk. There was nobody else outside, and some of the only things she could hear were the wind, the mice, the dogs, and the radios inside houses. "Hey you!" came a raspy whisper from between two buildings.

She turned to the right, and looked into the shadows of the alley. "Who's there?"

"Come closer, down here!"

Lorraine cautiously walked into the darkness, saying, "Who are you?"

A hand reached out, grabbed her arm and pulled her deeper into the darkness. "Do you want to do something that can make you have a meaning?" The person began. "That will help somebody, and will make people notice you."

"What… What's the thing?"

"Have you ever heard of Lord Voldemort?"

"N-n-no." She said.

"Excellent… Well, do you want to work for him?"

"Well…"

"Excellent."

Pain suddenly surged through the arm that the person was holding. "If anybody hears about this, you will suffer a most painful death." And with that, the person disappeared.

Lorraine sat in the empty compartment of the train. She rolled up the left sleeve of her blouse. Right there was something that looked like a tattoo of a skull and a snake coming out of the mouth. The arm still burned badly, and she couldn't stand it anymore. She was starting to regret she had ever walked into that alley.

The door to the compartment opened, and she quickly rolled down her sleeve. "Hello Cameron."

Cameron was a short girl, one year younger than she was. She had dark brown hair, green eyes and a unique sense of fashion, which she couldn't express when she had to wear her school uniform. She was sometimes what people called a 'tomboy' but would get mad at anybody who called her that. "What's up?"

"Nothing."

Lorraine looked out of the window, which was covered with raindrops. She could hear the rain falling down hard on the train. "I don't want to go to school this year. But my parents are making me."

"Why not?"

"There's not really much of a point to it."

"Yes there is!"

"Sure…" She sighed, grabbing her left arm, attempting to stop it from hurting. The pain was almost unbearable.

_Regret but don't reveal,_  
_Take but don't steal,_  
_Stinging and pain,_  
_Not yet to blame._

"Yes, professor. I won't use the Time Turner for anything bad. Have I ever broken a rule? No."

"Okay then, Miss DeAmico, but please remember that if you use it for anything but to get to your classes, we will find out and you will get in trouble with not only the school but possibly the Ministry as well."

"Yeah, I know. I know." Lorraine said to Professor McGonagall. "I'm the kind of person you can trust with this time glass thing. I'm nothing like those Marauders."

"Okay. You may go back to the Great Hall for the feast. Good day."

"Okay, b-" Mid-word, the tattoo on her left arm started to sting more than before. Her right hand flew to her arm and gripped the spot where the tattoo as she dropped down onto the floor of the professor's office, groaning in pain.

"Are you okay, Miss DeAmico?" McGonagall asked.

Still clutching her left arm, Lorraine stood up, nodding. "Yeah, sure. Don't worry about me. I cut my arm by mistake this morning. It's nothing."

"Do you want to go to the Hospital Wing?"

"No. No, really." She forced a smile.

"Well… You may go now."

"Bye." She stumbled out of the office.

Why was it suddenly hurting so much? She rolled up her sleeve, and looked down at the tattoo, which was now almost glowing. What did it mean? Was somebody trying to contact her? Or maybe they were trying to summon her…

She couldn't risk just going to the Great Hall and hoping for the best. Lorraine ran out of the castle and looked around. She had to get off grounds, so maybe someone could apparate her to wherever they wanted her to go.

She ran across the grounds, running faster every second, just as the tattoo was hurting more and more every second. By the time she got to where it definitely considered off the grounds, the tattoo was burning like hell. She fell onto the ground, clutching it. Not only was she in pain now, but she was also tired, and hungry. She had missed the feast and hadn't had lunch, nor breakfast.

_Confusion,_  
_Hunger,_  
_Tears,_  
_Pain._  
_To make her day the worst,_  
_All she needed was rain_.

Just as Lorraine thought up that poem in her head, she disappeared and reappeared in a dark, cold graveyard.

_**A/N:**_  
**_Duuuude! It took me about one month to write this, and would've taken me longer if I hadn't been on my computer for 12 hours everyday for the past few days. I would really appreciate if you review this, and tell me everything that's wrong about the fanfiction so far and everything that you like about it, because that will just help me make my next story even better! You can also ask me questions in the review, and I'll answer them in my next chapter. If the story ever gets boring, please don't just stop reading it, because it will end up getting interesting soon. I hope you enjoyed chapter one! Next chapter will be up in a week from today, February 23, 2005. Bye!  
_**


	2. The Graveyard

**ALL POETRY IN THIS FANFICTION, UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE, WAS WRITTEN AND BELONGS TO ME. YOU MAY NOT USE IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. **

**Disclaimer: All things from the Harry Potter books in this fanfiction do not belong to me. They belong to J. K. Rowling.**

O0o0O

_Confusion,  
Hunger,  
Tears,  
Pain.  
To make her day the worst,  
All she needed was rain_.

Just as Lorraine thought up that poem in her head, she disappeared and reappeared in a dark, cold graveyard.

There were four other people there. One standing by a grave and the other three standing in a circle 2 meters around him. All of the people were wearing cloaks with their hoods up. Lorraine began to think that she was in the wrong place, but then one of the three people in the circle motioned for her to come closer.

"Lorraine DeAmico. 17 years old. Black hair. Brown eyes. Has a constant feeling of being small and invisible. Has a dead mother, and a father who doesn't care much for her, but is kind to her. Joined the Death Eaters this morning." Said the person in the middle.

Death Eaters? Is that what they called themselves? "Listen, I really don't know what I'm supposed to do and I really gotta get back to Hogwarts so-"

"SILENCE!" He said loudly. "You do not talk back to the Dark Lord. You do not disobey the Dark Lord. You do not betray the Dark Lord… Unless, of course, you want to die."

She nodded slowly.

"There is an organization against the Dark Lord. It is called the Order of the Phoenix. Several members of the Order go to your school. Your job is…" He laughed coldly. "To kill them."

Lorraine gulped. What had she gotten herself into? She obviously hadn't killed anybody in her life. Please, no….

"You have doubts in your mind and have never killed anybody before. You're scared. You're also wondering who the people are."

How did he know this stuff?

"Their names…" He said. "Are Evans, Potter, Black, Pettigrew, Meadowes, and Lupin."

O0o0O

Lorraine sat on her bed in her dormitory, thinking about what had happened half an hour ago. So, this Voldemort guy, who called himself the Dark Lord, wanted her to kill five of the most popular people in her school and, according to Cameron, the most popular girl in the 6th year. How was she supposed to do that? They were always surrounded by their groups of friends. There was no way she could do that without someone figuring her out.

And what was the point anyway? The 'Dark Lord' seemed pretty evil, and she didn't really want to kill some of the only people trying to stop him. In fact, she would probably be willing to join this Order of the Phoenix. And what if he was lying? What if the Marauders, Dorcas Meadowes and Lily Evans weren't in this 'Order'?

She went down to the bathroom and grabbed a piece of paper towel. She wet it, then walked back to her bed and closed the curtains around it. She rolled up her sleeve and put the wet paper towel on the tattoo. She supposed that it would help it stop hurting but it didn't help at all.

_She's falling deep down,  
Wishing she were gone,  
Serving to the crown,  
Trying to be strong.  
Her left arm full of pain,  
Her head full of anger,  
Innocent dragon to be slain,  
Wishing she were stronger.  
Tears falling quickly,  
Sobs behind curtains,  
A tattoo on her arm,  
She's confused,  
And she's uncertain._

Lorraine looked down at her hands. Tears were falling out of her eyes now. Not only was she scared to do anything that bad, but also she was scared that she would fail, and be killed by Voldemort, or she would be caught and be sent to Azkaban by the Ministry. She would get in even more trouble because she was in this willingly.

A few knocks came from the door, and Lorraine rolled down her sleeve, hopping off of her bed and walking over to the door. "Hello?"

It was Cameron. "Hey."

"What's up?"

"I was wondering where you were during the feast."

"Talking to McGonagall." She said quietly. "About stuff."

"You missed the sorting for that? This is your last year you could've seen the sorting, and you missed it for _that_?"

"Well." She said. She still could've made the sorting if it weren't for the Death Eater meeting.

"Good night Lorraine Miranda DeAmico."

"Good night Cameron Geraldine Simons."

"We have the worst names." Cameron laughed.

"I agree. Bye."

"Bye."

Lorraine closed the door and walked back to her bed. The red curtains were still closed around it, like she usually kept them. She loved privacy, seeing as the other 4 girls in the dormitory were nosy. She was friends with them, but wasn't really part of their group of friends.

She crawled under the curtains and onto her bed, rolling up her left sleeve again. How was she going to kill them? So what if she somehow managed to get them into an empty room? How would she be able to kill them? Avada Kedavra was the killing curse, but if she did that she would be sure to get caught. No, she would have to do it the muggle way.

Lorraine reached under her bed and pulled out a pair of pajamas. After changing, she still just sat on her bed. How would she ever be able to kill them without them fighting back? How was she supposed to do it alone? It would be six people who knew the best ways to defend themselves against one girl who only had a knife.

Hat was all she would be to them. Some girl with a knife. No threat, no danger. They would treat it like a joke. Dorcas would just stare at her like she was crazy. Lily would just stand there. The Marauders would burst out laughing.

_No threat,  
No danger,  
Just a girl with a knife.  
Laughter,  
Grins,  
Saying that I have no life.  
But they'll be wrong,  
They'll die,  
I don't know how,  
And I don't know why,  
But when I'm done,  
When I'm through,  
They'll be the ones,  
The ones with no life._

Somewhere in the castle, Lupin, Black, Potter and Pettigrew were probably thinking up a prank, thinking of every possibility to make it the best yet, but they had no idea that at the same moment, a girl they never noticed was plotting to kill them. Somewhere in the castle Lily Evans was probably doing homework, thinking about the correct answer to the question, but she had no idea that at the same moment, a girl that she had never noticed was plotting to kill her.

Somewhere in the castle Dorcas Meadowes was probably… Well Lorraine didn't really know what Dorcas would probably be doing but she was sure that she also had no idea that at the same moment a girl that she had never heard of was plotting to destroy her, to shred her into pieces, to stab a knife into her.

O0o0O

**_A/N:_**

**_Did you like it? I hope you did! But anyway… Er… I know some people read this but don't review. If you're one of those people, PLEASE review, so I know that somebody is actually reading… And to reply to _evahyoung_'s review, I will say:_**

**She didn't become a Death Eater on the train, but on the way to Kings' Cross. So no it wasn't a student. Sorry that it wasn't clear. There was supposed to be a break in between the two parts, and it didn't work... And Lorraine really isn't stupid, but just scared. Picture a 17 year old girl walking, and somebody whispers to her to come, and she goes out of curiosity and then the guy asked her if she knows who Voldemort, and she truthfully says yes, and then he asks her if she wants to work for him, and she is about to say no, but he puts the Dark Mark on her arm and then there's nothing she could do... And she becomes a Death Eater at the beginning, because if I started the story earlier, it would have been very booooring because Lorraine's life was pretty much boring before that. Thanks for reviewing!**

_**BYE EVERYONE!**_


	3. The Dream

O0o0O

Lorraine looked to the back of the class, where the four boys were sitting. They looked so happy. Why did she have to kill them?

When Sirius looked in her direction, she quickly turned back to look at the professor, pretending that she hadn't been staring at them.

Sirius was definitely used to people staring at him though. He was the most good looking guy in Hogwarts, and even when he was messed up, he still looked damn hot. If he fell off of his broom, and landed face first in the dirt, he would still look great.

But despite how good Black looked, she never liked him that much. She never really knew why though. He just wasn't… her type.

The bell rang, and she grabbed her bag. She rushed out of the classroom, because dinner was next and she was starving.

It was Friday afternoon now. Lorraine decided that if she was going to kill them, it would have to be on a Friday. Nobody would notice that they weren't in classes until that Monday, and by then, it was possible to hide all evidence.

Lorraine walked down to the Great Hall. It's been 6 years and 5 days, and everything stilled seemed new. She had grown up in what she thought was a muggle family. Her father didn't even tell her that she was part of a pureblood magic family until she managed to steal the Hogwarts letter from him.

When she went to Hogwarts, everything became different and her childish thoughts all vanished away. She met new people, did new things, and was cared for by different people. Well, nobody really did care for her.

Every summer she would go back home to her empty town and face another horrible two months away from school. Her father would treat her nicely, but she knew the truth. He thought that she didn't remember but she did. She remembered too well.

When she was little, she wasn't shy at all and always found the good inside. She spent her days looking for the silver lining. When she was two years old, the town was still full of people, and she was friends with most of the little kids there. As she grew up, she watched the town get emptier and emptier until it was so empty that she knew all the people living there.

Lorraine sat at the Gryffindor table next to Cameron and Cameron's friends. She was looking down at the table as she ate a piece of burnt toast. Normally, she wouldn't sit around, feeling sorry for herself, but now everything was different. She was working for the dark side and everything was different now.

She tapped her fingers on the table boredly. "The life of a girl who messed up badly." She said to herself quietly.

O0o0O

Lorraine almost slept through the weekend. She didn't think that much when she didn't have classes, so when she woke up on Saturday morning just before lunch, she was no longer feeling sorry for herself.

After lunch, she did her homework, then went to dinner, and then went back to her dormitory and straight to sleep. The tattoo on her left arm wasn't hurting anymore, so it was getting easier to stop thinking about it.

Sunday was the same thing, and even though there was this memory of the past week tattooed on her arm, Lorraine managed to have a show a smile every once in a while.

_A memory in the form of a skull,  
Life is starting to get dull.  
It may take a while,  
But I can manage a smile.  
A memory in the form of a tattoo,  
And a mission to kill a crew._

O0o0O

About two weeks later, the tattoo started burning again, so just like on the first day of school, she ran all the way off of the grounds, and then disappeared. She appeared at the graveyard again. This time there were seven people there, all wearing identical cloaks.

Feeling very different in her school uniform and Gryffindor scarf, Lorraine just stood there. Most of the Death Eaters were probably Slytherin and definitely didn't like Gryffindor. "You haven't killed them yet." Voldemort said in his usual scary voice.

Lorraine opened her mouth to speak but remembered that she wasn't allowed to talk back to him. She kept just standing there silently.

"You have 3 months."

Lorraine kept her thoughts out of her mind. She was sure that he could read minds, so now she never felt safe anywhere around this Dark Lord… What was she saying? Who would feel safe around somebody who calls himself the Dark Lord, even if he didn't read minds?

Lorraine appeared back at Hogwarts. She ran across the grounds and inside. On the way to the common room, she passed James and Sirius, people who would be dead in three months if everything went well… or not well.

_Three months left,  
And I'm growing strong,  
Ninety days left,  
But it feels so wrong.  
They'll be dead soon,  
And my heart will be too.  
It'll be a Friday afternoon,  
And I don't know what to do.  
Poor people,  
Gonna die,  
But I don't care anymore.  
'Cause I won't cry.  
So save me,  
Help me,  
The Dark Lord is controlling me.  
I hope he's not,  
I hate this plot,  
And I hope I don't get caught.  
I want to leave now,  
I want to go back,  
I need to leave now,  
I need to go back,  
Memories surrounding me,  
And I'm losing my ability to write poetry._

O0o0O

That night, Lorraine couldn't fall asleep. She lay in her bed, staring up at the ceiling. She had 3 months to kill those six people, and not only did she not want to, but she also had no idea how to.

She closed her eyes, and blackness was everywhere. "I need to fall asleep…" She said to herself.

After laying there for what seemed like hours, she finally drifted to sleep.

_She was running, running. It was dark and the grounds of Hogwarts were empty. She was screaming, screaming. Blood was on her hands. She was still screaming and running when she passed the lake, the pumpkin patch. She kept running, through the forbidden forest. Then a light came. A black light. She was floating up to the black light, then a face, a face she could not recognize. A handsome face… The face of Sirius Black. And then darkness._

_Then there was a voice. A voice as if it were real. It said, _"If you gain their trust, you will be able to kill them."

O0o0O

_A/N:_

_Do you like it? I don't know why, but I do. One fanfiction that I'm actually proud of, which is also the fanfiction that nobody wants to read or review. I need to know what you like and what you don't so all my future fanfictions can be BETTER! You people are really dropping my self esteem!_


	4. The Befriendment

**ALL POETRY IN THIS FANFICTION, UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE, WAS WRITTEN AND BELONGS TO ME. YOU MAY NOT USE IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. **

**Disclaimer: All things from the Harry Potter books in this fanfiction do not belong to me. They belong to J. K. Rowling.**

O0o0O

"If you gain their trust, you will be able to kill them."

After the words appeared in her mind, Lorraine's eyes shot open. She sat up, and found herself staring at the red curtains again. Having no memory of her dream, or the message that appeared after it, she sprung out of bed and over to the bathroom. After getting ready for class, she walked out of her dormitory and into the common room.

It was suddenly all clear to her. In order to kill them, she had to become their friend. Now the only hard part was to get them to notice her… Which was almost as hard as the previous plan.

Becoming friends with the Marauders would be impossible, but maybe she could gain Lily's friendship. She could see that Lily was starting to be friends with the Marauders and be able to talk to James Potter without yelling, so if she was Lily's friend, then when Lily became their friend, she would too. It was brilliant… but still very hard.

Lorraine walked to the Great Hall. She stood by the door, staring at the Gryffindor table. Lily Evans was sitting with another girl, whose name was Alexis Kane. Alexis was eating her breakfast, not talking, and Lily seemed bored. Perfect luck she had today. Lorraine took a deep breath and walked across the Great Hall. She stood by the Lily. "Er… Can I sit here?"

Lily looked up at Lorraine. "Sure."

"My name's Lorraine." She said, sitting down, a smile on her face now.

"I'm Lily."

Was it really this easy? Was all she had to do just go up to her and say Hi? It couldn't possibly be that easy. No, it couldn't be.

Lorraine ate breakfast quietly. When she was done, she looked up at Lily and asked, "Would you consider me…. Unpopular?"

Lily thought about it for a few seconds then said, "Well you don't really make much an effort to be noticed, do you?"

"Never thought it would work." She laughed.

"You can't always be that scared. You have to learn to take risks." Lily smiled.

"It's been sort of hard for me to do that recently, because of… recent events."

Lily, who had obviously realized that there was some kind of secret involved that she wasn't going to be told, nodded and looked back at her food.

O0o0O

Lorraine stood by her mirror, staring at her reflection. She looked at her straight black hair, tucked behind her ear and reaching down to somewhere between her elbows and her shoulders. She stared into her own brown eyes. She had big eyes. She had never noticed that before.

Lorraine looked down a bit lower, at her lips. They were so plain, so boring. She wore nothing on them; no lipstick, no lip-gloss, no anything. She looked slightly lower, at her neck. It was also so boring. It was not too long, not too short. She wasn't wearing a choker, or a necklace, or any kind of jewelry that goes on your neck.

Her eyes moved down, to look at her shoulders, then her arms. She wasn't fat. She could thank her father for that. Everyday she would have to run down to the deli and getting breakfast, then lunch, then again for dinner. The deli was half a mile away, and getting there and back would be a mile. Her father never let her have any candy. He said that he didn't want to have to pay for dental bills.

Lorraine looked down at her legs. Those weren't fat either. Her knee high socks reached to just below her knees. She had rather dry skin, and wished that the stupid socks would cover her knees.

Her overall appearance just wouldn't do. She would need to change a bit, but not so much that people would notice. She had to aim for a look that was… casual, but not over-casual and with a bit of evil, for the side of her that actually wanted to kill the six people.

Of course, she wouldn't change until she was sure that she was going to meet the Marauders.

Lorraine walked over to her bed and laid down. She smiled slightly. Now all she had to do was get Lily to consider her a friend, and be around when Lily finally accepted the Marauders for who they were. 

Lorraine grabbed an inkbottle and a quill. She dipped the quill in the ink and wrote on her hand the words 'Note to Self: Bump into Lily by mistake in the hall, say Sorry and then end up in a conversation.'

_I have a new friend,  
Her name is Lily.  
She's really popular,  
And she's really silly.  
But the bad news is,  
That I'll have to kill her.  
I wanna cry,  
Well that's not a thriller._

Lorraine rolled over onto her stomach, forcing a smile onto her face. She always thought that she looked ugly when she wasn't smiling, so she tried her best to keep a natural smile glued on her face… though when she was bored, she couldn't smile.

She rolled up her left sleeve and touched the tattoo. It was horrible. A horrible skull… A horrible snake coming out of it.

O0o0O

By the end of the month, Lily would consider Lorraine as her new friend. Since she was rather bored with her other friends, she would be able to call Lorraine her friend. The first day of October was a Saturday, and it was also the first Hogsmeade trip of the year.

Many people went to Hogsmeade to buy things they need. Some went because they were bored of staring at the same four walls of their common room. But some people, usually guys, used Hogsmeade trips as opportunities to ask someone out.

So anyway, Lily and Lorraine were eating breakfast. Lorraine had gotten to thinking about her assignment from Voldemort again. She wasn't really concentrating on her surroundings. Lorraine really didn't want to hurt her new friend. Lily didn't deserve to be killed. She was really, really kind and was never mean to anyone but Potter, who she had a good reason to be mean to.

When Lorraine snapped back into reality, she realized that she had turned her piece of toast into hundreds of crumbs. She sighed, waving her wand and saying "Evanesco!" The crumbs disappeared off of the plate.

"Hey Evans, DeAmico!" came a voice.

Lorraine heard Lily groan, "Potter…"

The two girls turned around to see James Potter and Sirius Black standing behind them. "What do you want?" Lorraine asked.

"Well," James started. "As you must know, today many students in Hogwarts who are in third year or above will go to the village of-"

Lily interrupted him. "No, Potter. I will not go to Hogsmeade with you. I've told you so many times and if you were as smart as you think you are, then you would surely know that by now and give up."

"Well, Evans, for once, you are actually wrong. I came here to tell you that I will _not_ be asking you out today."

"Yeah, sure." She said sarcastically, turning back around.

Lorraine sighed, watching the two boys walk back to Lupin and Pettigrew. After seeing them sit down, she turned back around to her plate and started to pile pancakes onto it. She reached across the table and grabbed a container of maple syrup. She started to squirt it on top of her breakfast.

"Hey, Lorraine. Can I ask you something?" Lily asked.

"What?"

"What… What do you think people would think if I started dating Potter?"

Lorraine had to bite her lip to stop herself from screaming of excitement. Everything was going as planned! Lily was starting to consider dating James! Luckily, biting her lip made her look like she was thinking, so Lily wasn't suspicious. "Well…"

"Well, what?"

"Well, they would definitely be very surprised, and there's no doubt that a few rumors would start, but you wouldn't have to worry because a lot of people don't even believe most rumors. A lot of people would think that you're a cute couple, and those who don't like you or James would probably think mean things but that's not really much of a surprise." She had thought about this much before, so it all came out easily and quickly.

"Oh." Lily, without another word, looked back to her breakfast. Lorraine could tell that she didn't like to talk about it.

Soon, the two would get together, and then, she would be able to gain their trust, and be able to kill her…

Lorraine just hoped she wouldn't get too attached.

O0o0O

_A/N:  
Does anybody read this? Well, I was going to wait for a review for Chapter 3 until I put this one up, but I was growing impatient, and put it up. Happy Easter to everyone who celebrates it! Preview of Chapter 5:_

_Lorraine's right hand flew to her left arm. "Ouch!"  
When she saw Lily and Miranda raise their eyebrows and give her questioning looks, asking if she was okay, Lorraine nodded, quickly saying "Be right back."  
She stood up and started to run out of The Three Broomsticks. On the way out, she disappeared._

_Remember that more people reviewing means that the chapter will come out quicker! I need comments and things like that to improve the chapter before I put it out!_

_Bye, bye!_


	5. The Hogsmeade Trip

_**ALL POETRY IN THIS FANFICTION, UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE, WAS WRITTEN AND BELONGS TO ME. YOU MAY NOT USE IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. **_

**Disclaimer: All things from the Harry Potter books in this fanfiction do not belong to me. They belong to J. K. Rowling.**

O0o0O

Lorraine rested her head on the window, closing her eyes tiredly. As the train rode along the bumpy train tracks, her head banged against the window repeatedly. Every time it went over a bump, her head would bang against it again. By the time Lily and her friend Miranda got back from asking someone about a store, Lorraine's forehead was red.

"What'd you do to yourself?" Miranda laughed.

"Nothing." Lorraine half-smiled.

"Think we're almost there?" Lily asked.

Lorraine shrugged. "No idea." A few seconds after she said that, the train screeched to a halt. "I take that back. Yes we are."

Lily laughed slightly, leading the other two girls out of the train. "Julia told us that they finally got a Hot Magic store in Hogsmeade. It's taking the place of that old café that always played classical music and served butterbeer in dirty wineglasses. What was its name?"

"The Green Tea Café." Lorraine said quietly. She had liked that café. They had good tea and excellent cookies.

"Oh." Lily uttered, then continued "And I'm so glad that there's finally a Hot Magic in Hogsmeade because the only other place anywhere in the country that has it is Diagon Alley and I only go there once a year to get school supplies.

"There's this excellent pair of boots there that I _need_ to buy, and a spell book that has the most 'unique' spells known to man. I think Potter has it. He probably uses it for his pranks or stuff.

"Honestly, I don't really get why Potter thinks he's so cool. He struts around school, saying 'Ooooh! I'm so popular and hot!' I really don't see why he finds so much enjoyment in pulling pranks and why he thinks he looks better when his hair is looks like it does when he just got off a broom. And speaking of broom, why does he always play around with that snitch he nicked? He got 5 detentions for that, and yet he still plays around with it whenever teachers aren't watching and…"

That was how Lily went from babbling about a popular store to ranting about things she hated about James Potter. Soon, they got to the store called Hot Magic. The walls were no longer olive green like the Green Tea café had been, and it definitely didn't look anything like it. There were shelves there now, and all sorts of things for sale. A table with a cash register now took the spot in the middle where the people used to sell snacks and drinks.

"OOOOH! I found the spell book!" Lorraine heard Lily scream happily.

O0o0O

Lorraine sipped her butterbeer slowly as she listened to Lily and Miranda's conversation. They were discussing the best ways to stay awake in Professor Binn's class, and possible reasons that he didn't realize that he was a ghost. Some things they said were pretty hilarious.

The three girls were now in The Three Broomsticks. Lorraine put down her butterbeer and boredly tapped the table. It was very surprising that eight days ago, she was excited to just talk to Lily, when now she was having lunch with Lily and one of her friends, and she was actually bored.

_Boredom,  
A sigh,  
What's up?  
Hi!  
Elevator music in my head,  
What was that you said?  
Boredom,  
Yawn…  
Boredom…  
PAIN!_

Lorraine's right hand flew to her left arm. "Owww!"

When she saw Lily and Miranda raise their eyebrows and give her questioning looks, asking if she was okay, Lorraine nodded, quickly saying "Be right back."

She stood up and started to run out of The Three Broomsticks. On the way out, she disappeared.

O0o0O

Lorraine was in the graveyard again, but unlike the other times she had been there, she didn't stand out as much. She noticed that she was now wearing the same kind of robes that the other Death Eaters were wearing.

She took a few steps and was now in the circle of people standing around Voldemort.

"_You're doing good, but hurry up._"

Lorraine nodded. "I'll get the job done as fast as I can."

"_You took Black's advice._"

What? Black… As in Sirius Black? No, it couldn't be. No, of course not…

"_Regulus Black, you idiot._"

Oh! How stupid of her! Sirius had a younger brother, who was in Slytherin, like the rest of Sirius' family had been. But… Sirius' brother was a Death Eater. Wow! "Yes. I did."

"_They'll be dead in less then 3 months._"

"Yes. They'll be dead."

"_And you'll be the one to cause their death_."

"Yes, I will be the one to cause the death of Black, Potter, Evans, Lupin, Pettigrew and Meadowes."

"_And you know that if they don't die in three months, then you will._"

Lorraine nodded, fear running through her body as she closed her eyes. "Yes, I know."

"_You may leave._"

When she opened her eyes, she was back in the Three Broomsticks. Lily and Miranda weren't sitting there anymore, and soon she noticed that nobody else was. That was actually pretty good, because Lorraine was still wearing her Death Eater robes. If someone found out that she was a Death Eater, then she would probably die, even if she didn't get the death penalty.

Lorraine took off the cloak and threw it into one of the bags of clothes that she had bought that day, then walked out of the store. She looked around. It was oddly silent there, although there were a few people walking around… None of them were Hogwarts students! OH no! The train! It would probably leave soon! Or maybe it already left!

Lorraine dashed down the road and turned the corner to where the train was supposed to be. It wasn't there… Now how was she supposed to get back to Hogwarts? How was she supposed to get back to Hogwarts now? Was she supposed to walk all the way there? It surely wouldn't be easy to find the way there, but she would get tired, and when she got back people would ask where she was!

Lorraine sat down on the ground, thinking hard. Well, if she was going to start walking, she had to start now…

After resting for a minute, she stood up and started to walk along the train tracks. She sighed, looking down at the grass. She was already starting to get tired.

Lorraine felt something wet on her hand. _Oh great! It's starting to rain…_

_Gotta walk around the world,  
And I gotta be done soon.  
It's suddenly much later.  
I thought it was noon.  
I'm slowly growing tired,  
And I'm not even a third done,  
It's starting to rain.  
So I have to go say bye to the sun._

O0o0O

_A/N:  
Sorry that it took _so_ long for the new chapter to get up. Reeeeaaally sorry, guys!_

_DrunkenBuddie, yeah I actually do read the quizzes about Dorcas. When I was writing this, I was thinking 'Well, why would she have to kill those five in particular when there were probably others in the Order who were in Hogwarts at that time?' so I added Dorcas to the list of people Lorraine has to kill.  
And he's a preview of Chapter Six:_

She ran up to the common room. "Screaming pixies." She said to the fat Lady.  
"I suggest you don't go in there. Mr. Potter and Miss Evans are screaming their heads off."  
"Screaming pixies. Let me in."  
"Okay. But don't say I didn't warn you!"

_So obviously Lorraine missing the train causes her to miss an argument between James and Lily. So… Good night people! I must go watch Spongebob trying to get out of Rock Bottom!_


	6. The Unexpected Relationship

O0o0O

Lorraine sighed loudly, lying on the wet grass. She had no idea about how long she had been walking, and how much more she would have to, but it seemed like she had been walking for an hour already. She had slipped about a minute ago and hadn't bothered to get up.

It was still raining. Drops of water fell on her face as she lay there, her eyes closed. They were probably wondering where she was… Oh, whom was she kidding? They didn't care enough to wonder where she was!

Opening her eyes, Lorraine stood up and started to slowly walk again. The rain was falling harder with every second, and she hoped that she would get back to Hogwarts before it got dark.

The farther she got, the faster she was walking, until she was running. Her soaking wet hair fell out of the rubber band it was tied up in, and the things she had bought were probably wet too. Soon, she was running really fast and she didn't even know why. Maybe it was because she was cold. Maybe it was because the sun was setting. Maybe it was because she wanted to be dry again.

Finally, Lorraine could see Hogwarts castle. She paused for a moment, then started running even faster than she had been running before, until she was standing right outside the castle. She sighed tiredly, opening the door and walking into the castle. She was glad to finally be inside the castle.

She ran up to the common room. "Screaming pixies." She said to the fat Lady.

"I suggest you don't go in there. Mr. Potter and Miss Evans are screaming their heads off."

"Screaming pixies. Let me in."

"Okay. But don't say I didn't warn you!"

Lorraine stepped into the common room, the door closing behind her. The fat Lady was right. Lily and James were yelling at each other wildly. What had she missed?

"AND YOU'RE ALWAYS STRUTTING AROUND LIKE AN IDIOT, AND YOU'RE THINKING THAT YOU'RE SOOOO COOL BUT GUESS WHAT, POTTER! YOU'RE NOT!" Lily screamed at James.

"I DON'T STRUT, EVANS! AND IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED, MOST PEOPLE IN SCHOOL THINK THAT I _AM_ COOL. YOU'RE NOT ALWAYS, RIGHT!"

"_FINALLY_ YOU ADMIT THAT THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG ABOUT ME. YOU KEEP TELLING ME THAT I'M PERFECT BUT I'M NOT!"

"I DON'T THINK YOU ARE! I JUST THINK THAT YOU'RE THE PERFECT GIRL FOR ME BUT GUESS WHAT, EVANS! I GIVE UP!" James screamed at Lily. He pushed passed many people, heading towards the portrait hole.

Lorraine stepped to the side so he could pass, but surprisingly, he didn't go through the portrait hole. James just stood there, staring straight ahead, as if he suddenly couldn't move.

Lily was biting her lip so hard that Lorraine could see her lip bleeding. James was still just standing there. Lily looked like she was on the verge of tears. James was still just standing there. Lily opened her mouth to say something, but then reconsidered and kept quiet as James was still standing there. Lily took a deep breath and said, "I love you!"

James turned around and stared at Lily in awe. "What was that?"

Lily ran over to James and looked up into his eyes. "I love you." She whispered.

"Can you say it one more time?" James grinned.

"I love you, you idiot!" She kissed his lips passionately. Lorraine could tell that James was in pure bliss.

And they kissed for a while, and everyone was just standing there, watching them in awe. "Awwwwww." Said a few people.

Finally, Lily Evans and James Potter were together. It was so beautiful. Lorraine smiled. Finally, they got along well.

O0o0O

Lorraine was sitting cross-legged on her bed in her dormitory, thinking about nothing in particular. She leaned over and stretched her arms forward, seeing if she could reach the end of the bed. She couldn't.

A knock came from the door. "Who is it?" Lorraine asked.

"It's Lily."

"Come in."

Lily opened the door and came into Lorraine's dormitory. "Hey."

"You got together with James."

"Yes, I finally fell in love with that git." Lily smiled widely.

"I knew it all along." She grinned. "Sometimes, you're so predictable."

Lily nodded. "About earlier today… What was that?"

Oh no… Oh no… Just deny it! "What was what?"

"When you suddenly left."

"When did I do that?"

"Today! Don't play stupid!"

Lorraine blinked. "I dropped my fork on my arm."

"That's all? How come you missed the train?"

"The line at the Healer's office was too long." Lorraine said.

"Why'd you leave in such a hurry?"

"Because it really hurt. I get hurt, like, so easily. I'm really weak and fragile." Lorraine said, closing her eyes and not opening them.

"Are you sure?" Lily asked quietly.

"Yes! Merlin! Lily, you worry too much." Lorraine groaned, lying her head back on her throw pillow, her eyes still closed.

"Well, sometimes worrying can save people's lives. Sometimes without somebody to worry, people would go crazy. Sometimes-"

Lorraine interrupted her. "Okay, okay! I get it!"

"Is your arm okay?" Lily asked. "Can I see it?"

"No!" Lorraine said quickly.

Lily raised an eyebrow.

"The Healer told me to keep it under the sleeve for a day. Sorry."

"Oh… Well, bye."

"Bye."

Lily left the room.

_A secret under my sleeve,  
I'm forcing people to leave.  
Can't help but act strange,  
And I wish I could change.  
Getting bored with this life,  
For no reason at all,  
Going through day after day,  
Like I'm waiting for my fall.  
I'm not aware of my surroundings,  
Nothing seems astounding.  
I don't know what's been going on,  
That they're lives will soon be gone.  
It's like the world is all insane,  
What's wrong with their brain?  
There's a feeling of regret,  
And I'm trying to forget,  
But there's a mark imprinted on my hand,  
Deciding where I must stand.  
I can't even make my own decision,  
It's blurring my vision.  
I'm living by someone else's set of rules,  
Among a set of fools.  
I wish I could disappear,  
Need someone to kill me…  
Will you volunteer?_

Lorraine was tired of having to do everything that Voldemort said. She was tired of having to hide that she was a Death Eater. She was tired of not being able have fun being Lily's friend. She was tired of having to live secretly.

O0o0O

Sorry it took ages to put up! I was all caught up in Connect the Dots, and I sort of forgot about this. Sorry again!


	7. The Blonde

O0o0O

Lorraine's eyes flickered open, immediately darting to the clock hanging on the wall. The small hand was just below the twelve and the big hand was between the nine and ten. It was 11:48.

She turned over so she wasn't facing the clock anymore, and closed her eyes again, trying to fall back asleep. "Wake up, Lorraine." Came a voice that Lorraine could not recognize because of she was still half-asleep.

"No." she groaned tiredly, covering her ears with her pillow. "Leave me alone."

"But you're going to miss lunch. Evans has been coming in every half an hour to see if you're awake!" said a different voice.

"I don't caaare." She mumbled, her eyes closed shut.

"But we do!" screamed two of Lorraine's dorm mates, Carlie and Matilda.

So Lorraine grouchily got out of bed and got dressed. She walked down the stairs into the common room without brushing her hair. When she saw that Lily was sitting on the couch and talking to all four of the Marauders, she quickly grabbed a hair band and tying her hair up into a ponytail.

Lily motioned to Lorraine to come sit with them, so she walked over and sat down on the table in front of the couch they were sitting on. Remus and Peter were sitting on the armrests. Sirius was sitting next to Remus, but on the back of the chair, so his feet were where you're supposed to sit. Lily and James were sitting in the middle. James's arm was around Lily's waist.

"Good morning." Lily said.

Then each of the four boys said good morning, then Lorraine.

"Guys, this is Lorraine. Lorraine, this is Remus, Peter, James and Sirius." Lily introduced them all.

Lorraine smiled widely. "Hey." She suddenly wished that she had brushed her hair before coming into the common room.

"Why are you sitting all the way on the table? Sit on the couch!" Sirius said, grabbing her hand and pulling her to the couch so she was sitting on his left and James' right.

Lorraine smiled up at Sirius, then looked down at her hands awkwardly, not knowing exactly what to say.

"You're hair's messed up." Sirius grinned.

Lorraine laughed slightly. "Oh so Potter's allowed to have messy hair and I'm not?" she said.

"Prongs has a right to have messy hair." Sirius laughed, leaning down and kissing Lorraine's cheek.

At first, Lorraine was shocked at what Sirius had done, but after a few seconds, she realized that Sirius kissed girls who were just his friends. Lorraine smiled brightly, looking up and kissing him back.

"You don't look good with black hair." Sirius said, taking Lorraine's hair out of the hair band so it fell to her shoulders. He tapped her head with his wand and her hair turned brown. "Accio mirror!" A hand mirror flew into his hand and he handed it to Lorraine so she could see her new hair color.

"Ugh!" She said, staring at her reflection. "Change it back."

"Change it back yourself." He tapped her head again and her hair turned dirty blonde.

"Well…. It's better than brown." Lorraine said, taking her red hair band back from Sirius and tying her hair back up.

"So you're keeping it like that?"

"Well, I can't change it back, can I?" Lorraine could tell that Sirius had thought that she would be more stubborn and make him turn it back, but she could admit that she wasn't obstinate at all; She was the opposite of stubborn.

"I could've changed it back for you." Said Remus, who was apparently listening to their conversation.

"Well… I sort of like it better this way." Lorraine said.

"Now all you have to do is brush it." Sirius grinned.

O0o0O

What really surprised Lorraine was how easy it had been to become friends with the five most popular people in their year. The hardest part was to stay calm and make sure that none of them ever rolled up her left sleeve. During lunch, she didn't sit with them, but by herself. After lunch, she really didn't feel like talking to anybody, so she quickly got out of the Great Hall before they could stop her.

Lorraine sat outside by the lake, barefoot, her toes in the cold water. She watched the shadow of the squid in the water, swimming around.

She didn't seem to get bored, just sitting there. She seemed lost in her own thoughts, which she could not recognize. She was thinking about something, of course, but she had no idea at all about what her thoughts were. Maybe she was thinking about Voldemort. Maybe she was thinking about her hair. Maybe she was thinking about Sirius.

When she felt a drop of rain fall onto her hand, Lorraine tumbled into reality. She took her feet out of the water and put her shoes back on.

She managed to get into the castle before the rain started falling too much.

_A new set of friends,  
They'll be here 'til their end.  
But the end's coming soon,  
Then I'll cause their doom._

_A new set of hair,  
That won't stop despair.  
Head tapped with a wand,  
Then it was blonde._

_A new dream to see,  
But it won't be free._

_A new mile to run,  
For a knife and a gun._

_A new letter to send,  
So I can cause an end._

O0o0O

Lorraine sat in the corner of her dormitory, on the opposite side of the window. She couldn't really understand why she wanted to be away from people suddenly, but she had a feeling it was because she was scared of… Well, scared of being there. Deep inside she felt strange. It was a feeling that she couldn't describe. She was pretty sure it wasn't happy, and it wasn't just scared. It was sad as well, and a bit bored.

She tapped the floor boredly, sliding down so she was lying on the floor, instead of sitting. One thought ran through her mind, one word. _What?_

Suddenly tired of doing nothing, Lorraine jumped up and went into the common room. Sirius was sitting on the floor and talking to Peter as he played wizard chess with Remus. James and Lily weren't in the common room.

Lorraine sat down behind Sirius. He didn't seem to notice her as he watched one of the chess figures move.

She made no effort to get him to notice her. Peter and Remus knew that she was there, but could tell that she didn't want them to tell Sirius. They didn't know why, though.

Lorraine sat there. She was lost in her thoughts again, and actually knew what she was thinking.

_I love your hair, Sirius… Sirius, just turn around. Sirius, you're so stupid. Sirius, will you please turn around. Sirius, can you tell me why it's so hard for you to notice me? Sirius, in case you don't know, I don't like you as more than I friend. If you ever ask me out, I'll say no. Sirius, I'm gonna kill you…_

Lorraine wasn't sure if she was breathing. She definitely didn't hear herself breathing in and out, and her chest wasn't going up and down…. But if she hadn't been breathing for so long, wouldn't she have fainted by now?

Maybe she was breathing just couldn't tell… Tiredly, she just fell onto Sirius, leaning on his back, with her arms around his neck.

"Lorraine?" He turned his head around as far as he could so he could her.

Lorraine nodded slowly, her eyes closed.

"How long have you been there?"

"Dunno…" She said quietly. She was breathing now.

"Oh, well…" Sirius pulled her off of him so she was now sitting next to him. "What's up?"

"I'm tiiired." She laid her head on his shoulder.

"Then go to sleep."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because then I'll wake up at 8 PM and I won't be able to go back to sleep, so I'll have to spend the night awake. And that's worse than being tired now, because then I'll be bored."

"Oh… Well, you can read a book…"

"No."

"Do homework?"

"No."

"Draw?"

"No."

"You can come wake me up. Then you won't be bored…"

"But… I don't think I'll go to sleep. And don't argue."

"Okay."

Lorraine closed her eyes. She wished she could fall asleep right there, right then… And she did.

Sirius kissed her cheek, then carried her over to the couch and laid her down.

O0o0O


	8. The Name

O0o0O

When Lorraine woke up, it was seven o'clock and she was on the common room. Many people were still in the common room and some had left. After looking around, she saw that Sirius, Remus and Peter had left. She sat up slowly.

Everything seemed fake for some strange reason. She had a strange feeling that she was still dreaming, but after pinching her arm, she realized that she wasn't.

So she crawled off of the couch and slowly walked up to her dormitory, where she was tackled to the ground the second she got in.

"You're friends with Sirius Black?" It was Matilda and her other dorm mate Tara.

"Yes, yes I am." Lorraine pushed them off of her. Was it really that much of a big deal? Or… maybe it was. It was hard to admit that she had trouble staying relaxed and calm around Sirius anyway.

"And it's no big deal if he kisses you?" Tara asked loudly.

"No, not really."

"So he's just a friend."

"Yes."

"And Lupin and Potter too."

"Yes." She stood up.

"Oh MERLIN! You gotta introduce us to them!" Matilda shrieked.

"No. Introduce yourself to him." Lorraine pushed her way back out of her dormitory.

She knew what was going to happen next. They were going to act nice to her so she would introduce them to Sirius.

But no matter how un-stubborn she was, she wouldn't, because Sirius wouldn't like her if she seemed like a fan girl. If she was going to kill him, she had to be as close as a friend as possible.

Lorraine then realized that that would mean saying yes if he asked her out.

But she hoped he wouldn't.

O0o0O

Six days later, on October Eighth, on a Saturday, Lorraine once again slept late. This time though, she brushed her blonde hair for ten minutes before going into the common room and sitting down next to Sirius. Lily wasn't there. James was. Remus wasn't.

"I don't like your name, Lorraine." Sirius said to her as he played around with her hair.

"I don't like yours either. You're not serious at all. You never are, actually."

"Well I don't count. I have horrible parents. I'm allowed to have a horrible name. _You_ are not. I should change it… to Raine."

"Rain?"

"No, Raine. With an 'E' at the end." Sirius grinned.

"Raine… I don't like it."

"Too bad, cause that's all I'm gonna call you."

"Damn."

Sirius laughed. "You look funny when you're mad."

"That's because…" She cut herself off mid-sentence when the tattoo started burning, then stopped three seconds later. How strange…

O0o0O

"So _how_ many ex-girlfriends do you have?" Lorraine asked Sirius when they were sitting in the Great Hall for lunch.

"Seventy-two." Sirius said after swallowing the food in his mouth.

"Seventy-two?" Lorraine asked, in awe.

"Yup."

"But…" Lorraine closed her eyes to do some math. "If there's about 500 girls in Hogwarts, and 375 of them aren't in Slytherin. And out of those 375, 300 aren't ugly or something like that… And about 150 aren't too young for you. And about 100 aren't taken already… And about 85 would actually want to date you… That means that you only have about 13 girls left!"

"You're the first person to actually do the math." James said.

Remus nodded. "Not even me or Wormtail did the math."

"Yup." Sirius said.

"And, actually, knowing Sirius, I think that by June, he'll have dated those 13 girls." James pointed out.

"Wow." Lorraine said quietly. She couldn't help but wonder… Was she one of those thirteen girls?

Lily laughed quietly. "Black, I honestly don't know how you do it."

"Easy. Like this." He stood up and walked over to a Ravenclaw girl in their year who was walking by. "Hey."

"Hey Sirius." The girl smiled.

"So, Rachel, wanna go out some time?"

"Sure." Her eyes lighted up with joy.

"So, I'll meet you at the Entrance Hall at six tonight?"

"Yeah."

"Great. See you then, babe." Sirius walked back to the table and grinned.

"Amazing." Lily laughed.

"Wow." Lorraine said again, even quieter this time. "Now it's twelve…"

"Hey, Padfoot. Is Raine one of those twelve?" James asked.

"Depends."

"On what?" Remus asked.

"If she wants to be."

There was an awkward silence, which was something uncommon when around the Marauders. But, of course, soon they would face many new experiences. Some would be good, like Lily and James dating, and some would be bad, for example, being killed.

O0o0O

"Pass me the gold." Lorraine said to Lily.

They were sitting on Lorraine's bed that night and painting their nails Gryffindor colors to see if it looked good.

Lily passed Lorraine the gold nail polish. "You've really been spending a lot of time with Sirius lately."

"And Remus and Peter too." Lorraine said as she painted her left thumb nail gold.

"But mostly Sirius." Lily smiled widely.

"Yeah, but…"

"I think he likes you, Raine." After saying _Raine_, Lily burst out laughing. Between laughs she said "Ask… him… out…"

"No way, Lily. He doesn't like me. He's _Sirius Black_." Of course, Lorraine didn't like Sirius at all, but she could admit that Sirius was popular and he didn't usually _like_ girls.

"So? Just because he's Sirius doesn't mean that he's a guy. He still usually has one girl that he likes more than anybody else. In this case, that girl is you. I mean… He might be all popular and date almost any girl, but he still can like one girl in particular."

"But why _me_?"

"Well… You're different. Different than all the other girls he's dated. You're more… innocent or…. Just different."

"But I-"

"So, did you like the pudding they had during dinner today?" Lily had changed the topic and Lorraine knew that she wouldn't be able to change it back successfully. Lily was more stubborn than she was.

_He was popular and hot.  
She was invisible and not.  
He was fighting against him.  
She was fighting for him.  
He was planning to date her.  
Not then, but maybe later.  
She was planning to kill him.  
But then she wasn't so sure that she was willing._

O0o0O

Okay, I have great news for you all! drum roll I'm getting married!

Okay, just kidding. I'm not getting married, but I'd like to say thanks to all those who've reviewed (Not more than 3 people, I know. Sometimes I wonder how many people really read this) and… I promise the next one's coming in a week, and that's about all! walks away, swinging hips like a model


	9. The Daily Prophet

O0o0O

"So how'd your date go?" Raine asked Sirius the next morning.

"Pretty well." Sirius said.

"Think you'll be going on any more dates with Rachel?" Peter asked. He was sitting between Raine and Sirius.

"No, not really. Don't like her that much."

Raine yawned. It was the first weekend in ages that she hadn't slept late, and this caused her to feel very tired. She lay down across Peter's legs, so her head was on Sirius's legs. She smiled up at Sirius. Neither of them said anything.

When she woke up that morning, Lorraine had actually started to call herself 'Raine.' She had no idea what persuaded her to call herself that. When she sat alone at breakfast, she had decided that she needed a reason, just in case anyone asked. So, she decided that her new name came along with her new hair, that her new hair didn't like her old name at all.

Raine lifted her head as much as possible so she could kiss Sirius's cheek lightly. She smiled. She loved having him as a friend.

"They planned the first Quidditch game to be the day before Halloween." Sirius said.

"Gryffindor vs. Slytherin?"

"Yup. Wanna go with me?"

O0o0O

_Knew it would happen,  
But it still came as a surprise.  
Not a bad thing at all,  
But I still can't open my eyes.  
Don't want to wake up,  
It's the middle of the day.  
Don't want to get out,  
I won't know what to say.  
It was predictable,  
But I was still shocked.  
I saw it coming,  
But now my eyes are locked.  
They're not going to open,  
You can't make them.  
They're staying closed,  
Until only I know when._

Raine didn't want to get out of bed. She felt strange. She had known that this would happen eventually, and had no idea why she had been so surprised.

And it wasn't a bad thing at all. It would just make her job easier. Of course, right now, that was the only reason she had agreed to go to the Quidditch game with Sirius. If she weren't on a mission, she would have definitely turned him down. She didn't like him as more than a good friend. He didn't seem like the type of guy that she would date… Well, to her, nobody seemed like the type of guy that she would date.

She lay there for a while, wondering if Lily was in the common room and wanted her to come up. Luckily, she hadn't fallen asleep yet, because that would have really disappointed her.

She forced herself to go back into the common room. Raine really wished that she hadn't told Sirius that she would go with him.

Why was she making a big deal of this? Raine forced a realistic smile onto her face as she saw Lily talking to James, Sirius talking to Remus and Peter talking to one of Lily's friends. She hadn't been their friend that long, but she was already used to seeing their faces. She was doing a good job on her mission so far. Honestly, if she had really wanted to kill them, they could've been dead already.

Although she looked cheerful to them, inside she was really wishing she were drowning in the lake at the moment. If she died, then they wouldn't have to die for a while. But of course, she wasn't going to go kill herself just so her friends would live.

Raine sat down between Remus and Peter. "Hey guys."

"Hey Raine." Peter said cheerfully, looking at her for a few seconds, then looking back at Lily's friend.

Sirius grinned at Raine. "Hi."

"Hello Sirius." _Just don't think about the date. Don't think about it and you'll be able to relax._

Sirius reached over Remus's legs to kiss Raine's lips, but she turned her head so he kissed her somewhere between her cheek and her lips instead. She really didn't know why she had done that but it seemed more right than letting him kissing her.

Sirius either didn't think her actions were strange, or was hiding it, because he just went back to his conversation casually. Raine smiled brightly. This time the smile was partly real.

Never before did she realize what a good actor she was.

O0o0O

It was an average week, just like the next week. Raine and Sirius didn't show anything that would let people guess about their date coming up the day before Halloween. It wasn't that they were keeping it a secret; If someone had asked, they would've told, but they just didn't feel like spreading the word.

Raine had started to realize that she had a great fear of rumors spreading. That was her reason for not talking about her date. Not even Lily knew yet.

If rumors would start spreading, then any student who were also Death Eaters would definitely think that she wasn't doing her mission, that if she was going to start dating Sirius, then she wouldn't have the courage to kill him. But so far, she didn't like him enough to spare his life. In fact, she still only liked him as a friend.

James was spending a lot of time outside, on his broom. The game coming up was really making him panic. The team had almost lost to Slytherin the year before, but they managed to get the snitch first.

The Death Eater mark didn't start burning anytime that week, counting the weekend. Raine supposed it was because there was nothing involving her going on.

Since she really didn't know whom she was working for, Raine decided to start getting the Daily Prophet and see if she saw his name anywhere in there. If he were that bad, then it certainly would be. With all the homework she was getting, she kept forgetting to subscribe, but Sunday night, she managed to remember.

On Monday morning, she slept through breakfast and didn't get the paper, and on Tuesday she was too busy doing homework in her dormitory to go to breakfast, but on Wednesday, she did go to breakfast.

After paying the owl, she started to skim the paper for Voldemort's name. She could not see it anywhere. Where was it?

"Hey, Lily. Do you know who Voldemort is?"

Lily nearly choked on her bagel. "You okay?" Raine asked.

"Yeah… It's just that most people don't say his name."

"Why not? Who is he?"

"He calls himself the Dark Lord. He wants to kill all the muggles and muggle borns. Of course, just about everyone is against him, except for these horrible gits that decide to help him. They're called-"

"Death Eaters." Raine finished quietly.

"How do you know?"

"I… I've heard of them before."

"Well, they're really bad people. I can't believe you never knew who Voldemort is." Lily said before finishing her bagel.

"No one really ever told me these things before."

So this was whom she was working for? How horrible. She was working for some evil guy who wanted to kill muggles and muggle borns.

Right then, more than ever, she wanted to just break down and cry.

O0o0O


	10. The Quidditch Game

O0o0O

_I wish I could just die,  
Or that I could fly,  
So I could fly away,  
My wings flapping,  
The crowd clapping.  
Because I'll be the hero,  
No longer a zero.  
Cause I won't kill them.  
But I guess until then,  
I'll just sit here and cry,  
And I think that's fine._

Raine brushed her no longer new blonde hair very carefully that morning before going into the common room and looking around for Sirius. He wasn't there, so she supposed that he was already eating breakfast in the Great Hall.

She dragged herself to the Great Hall, not really wanting to go the Quidditch game with Sirius. She wished she could've just said no, because the three weeks had passed by so quickly, and the closer it had gotten to this day, the more she dreaded the date.

She had tried to ask herself why she didn't like Sirius that much, but nothing came to mind. Did she really need a reason?

Yes, she did. Maybe it was because he dated so many girls, and most of the rumors around school spread about people who were always dating somebody different. Maybe it was because she feared what Voldemort would say. It wouldn't be good if he got mad.

But she would explain to him that it was for the mission, and the mission only, that if she had not been a Death Eater, she would've declined.

Sirius was sitting next to James. They were both messily stuffing their faces with breakfast, like pigs. Raine chuckled quietly as she walked over to the boys and sat down next to Sirius.

Sirius immediately put his arm around her waist. "Good morning, Raine."

"Good morning, Sirius." She put on the best smile she could.

Raine could see Sirius staring at her hair. Staring and staring as his grin got wider and wider. "What?"

"Your hair's too neat." He grinned from ear to ear as he messed up her hair.

"I hate you." She said before kissing him lightly, then starting to eat her breakfast.

Maybe if they sat near Peter and Remus and Lily, it would be less like a date, and maybe Sirius would be too absorbed in the game to even treat her like his date… Raine tried her best to act like she really did want to be going to the game with Sirius, like she really did want to be more than a friend.

As she stared into the yellow scrambled eggs on her plate, she began to realize how much she had changed just for the point of the stupid assignment. She had changed her name, her hair color, and the people she spent time with. It was like Lorraine DeAmico was dead, like Raine was there instead of her. She might as well just not do the mission and let Voldemort kill her; She was already dead, so it wouldn't matter. Dead… All her life she had been scared of dying, and now she was dead already and it took her a while to realize it.

She couldn't stand it. She really couldn't. It wasn't just the thought of her personality being dead already, and it wasn't just the thought of having to kill her friends. It was Lorraine battling with Raine inside her head, neither of them bothering to control the body anymore. They were too preoccupied with their battle to keep Lorraine's body sitting up, to keep her head up, to keep her eyes open and everything else like that.

"No." She said in a quiet voice before falling down onto Sirius as if she had suddenly lost control of her body. But she was still conscience. She was awake… But she wasn't in her mind.

"You okay Lorraine?" Sirius asked, looking down at the girl lying on his lap with her eyes closed. She didn't seem to be breathing.

The only thing that gave her the ability to answer was the fact that Raine didn't want Sirius to think she had a problem. "Yeah…. Just… tired."

"You sure?"

"Yeah…" She sat up and smiled widely to show it. The battle was over. Raine had won.

O0o0O

Sirius and Raine walked down to the Quidditch pitch, hand-in-hand. James had left fifteen minutes before them. Remus and Peter were waiting there with them, and neither of them had any idea if Lily was even going to watch the game.

_Always on the verge of tears,  
What happened to those years?  
The years where I was glad,  
Glad just to not be sad.  
Glad to be alive.  
Well, I guess I should be crying,  
Because I've already gone through dying,  
And I still have to kill,  
Cause maybe I'm ill,  
Sick in the head, I mean,  
Not physically sick; I'm not green.  
So will you let me go?  
Let me fly away,  
So I can show,  
Show my true self._

Lily was sitting in front of them, between Remus and Peter. As the game started, it was just like she was sitting next to a complete stranger, until James almost fell off of his broom and was hanging by one hand. Raine heard Lily gasp loudly and put one hand on top of Remus's and one hand on top of Peter's, and then slowly putting her hands back on her lap as James got back onto his broom.

Raine leaned forward and whispered to Lily. "You were _so_ scared."

"Yeah…." Lily said quietly, smiling slightly.

"You really love a lot him, don't you?"

"Is it really that obvious?"

"Yes, it is." Raine leaned back onto her seat and Lily turned back to face the game.

Sirius smiled at Raine. "I like your blonde hair a lot more than I liked your black hair."

"It's just hair Sirius. Blonde is no different than black. It's just…. Much lighter."

"Yeah, but…"

"I hate your hair. It looks so damn good, even when it's messed up, or muddy. It's probably because of your face…. My mom used to say that beautiful girls look good in everything. I guess it applies to guys too." She said in a not-flirting way.

So far the only things that really made it a date was that they were sitting next to each other and that they called it a date. Raine was pretty happy about that at the moment, but if she was ever going to kill him, then she had to be as close as possible, but going out would make breaking up a possibility and him being her ex-boyfriend was even worse than him being just a friend.

Obviously, Sirius seemed to be noticing that it wasn't much like a date as well, so he turned around to look at her, and then kissed her lips. Raine, having been in lost in her thoughts, and the game, was surprised and jumped slightly. Since she was on the tip of the seat, though, the slight jump made her fall off of her seat.

Sirius laughed. "Sorry 'bout that." He held his hand out to help her up.

Raine grabbed his hand, but didn't stand up. Instead, she pulled him down and kissed his lips lightly, before sitting up and starting to get back up onto the seat.

Sirius, who was still holding her hand, pulled her back down so he could kiss her back.

There was a lot of cheering, so the two supposed that Gryffindor scored a goal. Lily turned around and started to comment, but saw the two on the floor and grinned. "Oh, sorry. I'll leave you two alone. I don't want to disturb."

"But we weren't kissing!" Raine protested. "I fell!"

"Yeah, sure." Lily said sarcastically.

Raine sat back up onto her seat. "I fell! And since I was holding his hand, he did too!" She was lying about things that didn't even matter now. How horrible of her to be a liar…

_I've become a liar and soon I will be a murderer. Tonight I have to go break into an innocent person's house to get a knife and a gun and a pair of gloves, and other things so people don't get suspicious. How horrible of me?_

O0o0O

Horrible chapter, I know. Meh. Thanks for reading it though, and if you're up to it, review.


	11. The Weapons

O0o0O

Raine grabbed her wand and tapped her head, while muttering a spell. She had to quiet so nobody would wake up. If it weren't for the reason she were performing it, she would have been proud that her Disillusion Spell (or whatever it was called; she didn't know) had worked.

She stuffed her wand into her pocket and walked over to window on her tiptoes. She was barefoot, because that would make it easier to climb down the Gryffindor tower.

Raine had a plan. If it worked, she would be able to get down. If it didn't, she would get severely hurt. She would place Wingardium Leviousa on herself. If her calculations were correct, it wouldn't let her float, but it would help her climb down the rope that she had hung out the window.

"Flutus Serdium." She whispered, pointing the wand that she had taken out of her pocket at her.

Raine slowly climbed out the window. She was petrified. What if she fell? The charm wouldn't work no matter what to make her keep floating.

She gripped the rope tightly and slowly started to climb down the side of the tower. When she got to a window, she climbed to the side of it, which was good because the people wouldn't see her, but bad because it made the rope swing, which made her even more scared. Every few windows, she would look down to see how much she had left, then keep going. She was scared, even if she wasn't afraid of highs. If she was risking her life, she had a reason to be scared.

Raine climbed down a little more then noticed that the rope wasn't long enough. There was only a foot left, and about eight more feet to the bottom. She stared down at the ground below her. She would have to jump the eight feet…. At least she would land on grass.

Closing her eyes tightly, Raine let go of the rope and started falling. She tried hard not to scream.

_Falling, falling, falling.  
Falling to my doom.  
Why, oh why did I decide,  
Decide to leave the room?  
Close my eyes and count to ten,  
And then I hit the ground,  
In the silent night,  
The thuds the only sound._

She had landed on her feet, then fell back down onto her bottom. She leaned back on her hands and smiled widely. She was alive!

Raine jumped onto her feet and did a little victory dance, then continued on her barefoot journey. Since it had started raining about an hour after the game ended, the grass was wet. It felt good, though.

It was cold. Raine pulled her cloak tight, wishing she had put on a sweater or something over her uniforms, and a pair of pants instead of a skirt. After a minute, the wet grass felt cold and it annoyed her. Every once in a while, she would step on a twig or something, and it would hurt, but she would keep going.

She stopped by the side of the hut by the forbidden forest to rest. She avoided looking to her left at the forest as she looked at her feet and saw that they were bleeding."Merlin… I should have worn socks."

Raine stood up and started walking. "What was that!" She whispered loudly, turning towards the forest. She swore she could've heard something in there, but turned back and continued on her way.

She wrapped her arms around herself to get herself warmer. A butterbeer would really come in handy right now. Singing to herself quietly, she kept walking.

She had the strange feeling that somebody was following her, but kept going.

She turned around silently to see if there was anybody there, then turned back and continued walking, not singing anymore. If there were somebody following her, then they probably heard her singing.

She couldn't risk anything if she wanted to get through this night without getting in trouble.

O0o0O

Raine lifted herself over the fence and looked up at the small house. Surely there was a knife and a gun somewhere. Everyone in this town was paranoid. She wasn't sure why, but she knew; She had been there before.

But how would she get in? Nobody left their door open. They were too scared of murderers and robbers. It was probably because there was a chain murderer living somewhere in the town, but nobody could figure out whom…

Merlin! What if this was the murderer's house? That would be horrible! He would kill her!

Fighting her urge to run away, Raine climbed onto the edge of the window and reached her arms up, but they couldn't reach the next window. She hesitated, biting her lip until the taste of blood came into her mouth. "I have to do it." She said before stepping up onto the two-inch top of the window. She was barely breathing. One centimeter off and she would fall.

She couldn't move. She was too scared. If she stopped leaning on the wall, she would fall! There was almost no chance that she would be able to balance.

Raine slowly lifted her right arm up. She was raising slower and slower, the closer it got to the window above. Her hand finally reached the bottom of the window.

She slowly lifted herself onto her toes, still leaning down onto the wall. She lifted her left arm up as well now, so then both her hands were on the bottom of the window. With the help of the floating Charm, which surprisingly hadn't lost its effect yet, she managed to climb up onto the window.

Raine lifted up the window and climbed into the empty room. She was inside. Great.

O0o0O

Raine threw her arms into the air in frustration. Was this the only person in the whole town without a knife or a gun? She glanced out the window, then at the clock. It was three o'clock already and she had to be back at Hogwarts in at least an hour and a half.

She opened the cabinet under the sink. Not there. She check the refrigerator. Not there either. This was the last room in the house to check and if there was a gun or knife in the house, it had to be there. Raine fell onto the floor and lay there with her eyes closed. _If I were a knife, where would I be?_

Raine opened her eyes. "Jackpot!"

Three sharp knives and a handgun were taped to the bottom of the table.

O0o0O

Okay, I know, _horrible_ chapter again, but I sort of had to write it. Lorraine doesn't know any spells that can kill people. Of course, there's Avada Kedavra, but she has no idea how to do that, and if she were standing there, about to kill somebody, she would stutter too much to say a spell anyway. So she has to resort to stealing a knife from somebody. Of course, it would be easier to see that it was she if she used a knife, but she planned on disposing the knife as soon as she made the murders….

Well, anyway, the next chapter's much more funnier and happier than this one.


	12. The Halloween Feast

O0o0O

Raine ran across the Hogwarts grounds. The knives and gun were rattling in her pocket. The sun would be rising in about an hour and she still had to be in her common room half an hour before it did. If it weren't for the teachers that could be patrolling the halls, she would've been able to get to the common room easily, but unfortunately, there were teachers in the halls.

Much to her surprise, she got to the common room without a teacher noticing her. When she got up to her dormitory, she took off the two charms on her, and pulled the rope out of the window. She stuffed the knives into a boot and put the boot into the closet, and covered it with a jacket.

She scrambled over to her bed and went under the covers. It was hard to believe that it was already Halloween.

O0o0O

"Oh! So now you're Black's girl friend?" screamed Tara.

"Just because I went on a date with him doesn't mean that I'm his girl." Raine muttered, as she brushed her hair.

"Sirius calls you his girl." Matilda sneered.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

Raine forced a grin onto her face. It came easily. "Well then, I'm his girl friend." She had to act happy so they wouldn't be suspicious.

"Can you tell him that there's a really pretty girl in your dormitory that-"

"No." Raine threw her hairbrush at her and walked down into the common room, swinging her hips like a model. She loved girls being jealous of her. It was definitely a new experience.

Raine smiled, running over to Sirius and jumping into his lap like a dog would. She looked up at him. "Good morning, Mr. Black."

"Good morning, Miss DeAmico."

She kissed his lips lightly. "Happy Halloween."

"Happy Halloween to you too." He kissed her back.

Raine laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes. "Did you do all your homework?" she yawned.

"I'll do it during breakfast." He said, kissing the top of her head.

I'll pretend I like you,  
I'll kiss your lips.  
I'll make girls jealous,  
When I swing my hips.  
Can you help me live?  
Can you help me smile?  
Can you be my friend  
For just a while?  
I'll smile at you,  
I'll hug you tight.  
I'll laugh loud,  
It'll all seem right.  
But it won't really be.  
Can you help me breath?  
Can you help me cry?  
Can you be my friend,  
Until I make you die?

O0o0O

The classes passed by slower than ever that day. The Halloween feast that afternoon was on the minds of most of the students and just about everybody could not wait for it.

Raine was eager to see the decorations in the Great Hall. A year before, they had really put up too many decorations. There were floating pumpkins and jack-o-lanterns, as well as bats flying high above the heads. Professor Dumbledore was wearing black and orange robes.

When Raine, Lily, and Remus got out of Ancient Runes, the two girls darted to the Great Hall while Remus ran off to find James, Sirius and Peter. The doors of the Great Hall were still closed, and Lily was the first one to open it. "I wonder what kind of…" She started but was cut off by loud laughter at was inside.

"Pink... pumpkins…." Raine erupted in laughter.

There were pink pumpkins floating around and vibrant blue bats flying around. There were light purple, pink and blue streamers. The Slytherin table was hot pink.

"_WHO_ IS RESPONSIPLE FOR THIS?" Screamed Professor McGonagall, walking into the Great Hall.

All eyes turned to the Marauders. "So just because we're usually are the guilty ones, we always have to be the ones who do all the pranks?" James said in a mock-offended way.

"DID you do it or not?"

"Well, yeah." James smirked.

Raine laughed, and so did many other people. They all knew what was coming next…

"A week of detention and 25 points from Gryffindor for each of you!"

When it was the Marauders, most people didn't care if they got points taken away from Gryffindor, because somehow, they managed to gain the points back.

The students started coming into the Great Hall and sitting at their tables (Well, everyone except for the Slytherins, who refused to sit at their pink table until it was back to its original color.). Raine sat next to Sirius, and across from James and Lily. Peter sat on James's left and Remus sat on Sirius's left.

"James, you really should be careful not to get expelled." Lily said. She somehow managed to smile and look concerned at the same time.

"Don't worry, Lil. I won't get expelled. Without the Marauders, this place would be way too boring, and the teachers know that." James grinned.

Raine listened to their conversation, a big smile on her face. They were meant to be together. It was so obvious. She looked over at Sirius and kissed his lips lightly. "You and your friends have the funniest ideas."

"I know we do." He grinned.

"And you also have the biggest egos."

"That's true as well." He kissed her cheek, then looked over at his food.

And for the rest of the day, she didn't even think about the horrible task ahead of her.

_There were pumpkins painted pink,  
And there were rats with blue ink.  
The orange and black,  
Became pink and purple.  
The silliness of it all,  
Makes me think of a word called spurlple.  
The evil table was a pretty color,  
And they refused to sit,  
Because they're not pretty,  
So they couldn't sit on it.  
Halloween was funny this year,  
And it might've been this one too.  
But this year I have friends,  
Friends who caused all the laughter,  
And I'm happy,  
So happy that I'm losing my ability to rhyme.  
And I gotta go now,  
Because I'm out of time,  
And I got the ability to rhyme back,  
So I'm even happier now,  
As happy as a purple cow.  
Because it's Halloween,  
And it's the happiest day of the year.  
Because it's right in between,  
Between summer and winter,  
And right now,  
Halloween is here._

O0o0O

That poem made me laugh. :D I forgot that I wrote this, I honestly did. I finished the story months ago, and I did reread it once a few weeks ago, but I never reread the poetry.

Sorry for the long wait! I was preoccupied with swimming but that's over now so I'll update faster.


	13. The Chapter To Be Named Later

O0o0O

After that great Halloween, all the other events had to get up onto a ladder to be as good as that. Nothing seemed as interesting anymore.

November started off the best way it could. People were talking about the Halloween prank between, during, before and after classes, for the whole week. The four boys served their detentions as planned, but earned their points back easily. Remus answered five questions that Tuesday, making him earn his twenty-five points back. Peter did 'good deeds' at every opportunity that week and got his points back. James did something good during Quidditch practice that earned him fifty points to gain his and Sirius's points back.

So far, no false rumors about Sirius and Raine had started spreading yet, which was great news for Raine. She didn't have to worry about that as much as she thought she would have to.

That Saturday, she woke up late and went down into the common room, as usual. Since none of her friends were there, she walked right out, and started heading toward the Great Hall for lunch but there was something that caught her attention. Most people wouldn't have been able to notice it, but caught in constant paranoia, she did.

A group of four Slytherins was standing by a statue and talking, and occasionally looking over at Raine and pointing to her, then looking back at the other people in the group. She instantly knew that they were talking about her, but didn't know whether or not it would be good to go over and do something about it…. A small voice suddenly came into her head. It was saying '_Come on, Raine! You're going to have to kill somebody in less than two months, and you can't even stand up for yourself! These are the kind of people that start rumors! Go devour them into a billion pieces… Not literally of course.'_

Raine's small delicate hands clenched into fists and she stomped over to them. When she was close enough to them, she instantly recognized one of the girls and one of the guys. Regulus Black and Narcissa… Well, she didn't really know her last name. She wasn't that good with names.

Then, it was like there was somebody inside of her, talking for her, because what she said next wasn't anything that she would normally say (Well, maybe Raine would but definitely not Lorraine.). "Listen, you bloody idiots, I don't really care what you _think_ about me, as long as you don't _say_ it, because I think it's pretty pathetic that you have to be all up in other people's lives, because you don't have one yourself. So just go get one!"

She started to head toward the Great Hall again, but Regulus grabbed her arm to stop her. "Er… Blondie, I gotta tell you something." He pulled her away from the other three.

_Don't you ever call me that again. I am not blonde… Well, technically I am, but… It's not my fault. And so what if I am blonde? What's wrong with blondes? Grrr!_ "What?"

"So I heard you're with my brother now."

"Yes. Yes I am." She said impatiently.

"And he just happens to be the same person who you're supposed to kill."

Raine wasn't sure if she was breathing now. He knew… Sirius's own brother knew. "Yes. Yes he is."

"Now, you may not be the brightest one in the school, but you are surely smart enough to find a problem somewhere in there."

"But going out with him will help me gain his trust, therefore letting me be able to… kill him."

Regulus smirked. "That's not the way it's going to sound when I explain it to the Dark Lord."

And then she realized it. Sirius's brother was a Death eater. Did he know it? "Don't you dare tell him or…"

"You know what you have to do to save yourself." He turned on his heels, then walked away.

O0o0O

"S-Sirius, c-c-come over h-here." Raine stuttered.

She was lying on the floor of his dormitory, staring up at the ceiling. Sirius and James were on the other side of the room, discussing some new prank ideas. They normally wouldn't discuss pranks in front of others, but they could tell that she wasn't paying any attention to them.

She heard him stand up and walk across the room. He lay down next to her. "Whatcha want?"

She could feel him looking at her, so she just rolled over so she was facing the other way. "I can't be with you anymore." She said in such a quiet voice, that she didn't even know if she was saying it.

"What was that?"

"I cannot… be… with Mr. Sirius Black anymore." She said in a slightly louder voice.

"W-what?"

She rolled over and kissed his lips, then rolled back over. "You heard me Sirius."

"No I didn't…"

"This is the last time I'll say it…. I, Raine DeAmico can no longer be with Sirius Black anymore. I, Raine DeAmico am breaking up with Mr. Sirius Black." She said loudly.

The words seemed to echo though the dormitory. Raine suddenly realized that she was crying. Why was she crying? _STUPID TEARS! Go away!_

"W-why?"

"I… I can't say, but if it were up to me… We would be together forever." She hugged him tightly, for the last time in weeks.

O0o0O

_I thought that it would be easy,  
That it would be like one, two, three.  
But as the words came out of my mouth,  
Tears came out of my eyes,  
And not only did I hear those horrible words,  
But I also heard my cries._

Raine was in the shower, fully clothed. She was lying in the tub, letting the shower water fill it and cover her body.

She slid back so her head was just above the water. Great. A few more inches of water and she would be able to drown herself.

It wasn't supposed to hurt so much. She had thought that she didn't like Sirius, but after breaking up with him, she realized how much she really did like him. She had never felt that way about _anybody_ before… But she couldn't say it was love, because it probably wasn't.

"I hate you, Raine." She said to herself as the water raised higher and covered her chin. Just one more inch.…

A few knocks came from the door but she didn't answer. No, she wasn't going to let one of her idiotic roommates ruin the best moment of her life- The moment that she was going to die.

"Open the door, Lorraine. It's Lily."

Raine shut the water off. "Come in. It's open. And I'm decent."

The door opened and Lily walked in. "James told me what happened."

She didn't answer. She couldn't answer. The water was covering her mouth and she was breathing through her nose.

"Sirius was pretty sad. You were one of the only girls that he actually liked. Why'd you break up with him?"

_Oh, great, Lily. Make me feel even worse_. Raine sat up and unplugged the drain so the water could come out of the tub. "Because I had to. And I had no choice. It was… A life or death situation."

"Did somebody threaten you?"

"No." She said with no emotion in her voice.

"I'm really, really sorry, Lorraine. Do you still wanna be his friend?"

Raine thought about it. Still being his friend would help her with her mission but… "M-maybe."

O0o0O


	14. The Second Chapter To Be Named Later

O0o0O

_Don't give me a knife.  
And don't leave me alone.  
'Cause I'm at the point,  
That I want to cut both wrists,  
And break every bone.  
So if you want me to live,  
Then watch what you give  
To me._

She didn't want to go into the common room, and since she was sure that Lily was at lunch, and so were her room mates, there was nobody who could make her. She could spend the rest of the day hiding from Sirius in her dormitory. Sure, she _could_… But _should_ she?

Was she really so scared of seeing Sirius? Recently, she had lost her fears of many things, because she had gained more important fears. They weren't childish fears, like her past fear of not being able to pass her seventh year. They were real fears, like death, breaking a heart, or having a broken heart.

She was beginning to consider walking down into the common room. It was not to prove that she wasn't scared, but simply because she was tired of staring at the four boring walls of her dormitory.

Her roommates had decorated their side with posters of famous singers. There was one poster of a Quidditch player, but that one wasn't up because they liked the way he played Quidditch, or supported his team, but it was because they thought he was terribly good looking. They probably didn't even know his name.

The walls of her side of the dormitory weren't decorated at all. This was just because she didn't have any favorite singers and didn't like people just because they were good looking… Well, usually she didn't.

Soon enough, she realized that she was going to have to see Sirius eventually, and she might as well just get it over with. It was one of those 'better sooner than later' moments.

"Accio brush." She muttered, waving her wand with her left hand and holding out her right hand so the brush could come there.

The brush flew across the room and right into her hand, which instantly started to brush her hair very carefully. She never noticed how many knots got tangled in her hair until she actually took the time to untangle them.

When her blonde hair was finally perfect, she put down the brush and walked down into the common room, looking straight forward until she got to the couch closest to the fire, and sat down. After taking the time to get comfortable, she turned her eyes from left to right to see if Sirius was in the common room. He wasn't, which actually let her relax. She had worried for no reason.

Or maybe she had worried for a reason, because just them the portrait hole opened and she heard four pairs of footsteps coming into the common room and very familiar voices that she wished she wasn't able to recognize, for only one reason. One of them was Sirius.

James was saying something to the other three. By the sound of his voice, it sounded like one of those stories that are a joke. Raine could recognize a few words: bed, scream, dormitory, window and shoes.

The other three boys were laughing at what James was saying, even Sirius. Lily had said that Sirius was sad, but it didn't even seem like it! This was probably as sad as he could possibly be after a break up.

She knew that they either didn't notice her, or ignored her, because they walked right past.

Raine was scared to go into the common room, because she was sure that Sirius was there, and she didn't really want to see him at the moment. But she knew that she would have to leave her dormitory eventually. It was better to get it over with sooner, right?

She quickly brushed her hair, then slowly went into the common room. "Thank Merlin. He's not here!"

She lay down on the couch and stared up at the ceiling, hoping that Sirius wouldn't come into the common room soon. "Please, please, please, please don't…"

But she heard the portrait hole open and footsteps coming into the common room. She heard the voices of four boys and couldn't help but recognize one of them as Sirius. _Please don't say anything to me_. She shut her eyes.

The voices passed her. She could hear James say something, then Sirius laughing and saying something else. Lily said that he was sad… Well, of course, this was probably as sad as Sirius Black could ever get about a breakup.

Well, at least she wasn't going to have to worry about dying anymore.

O0o0O

"No, Lily. I'm not hungry."

"No, Lily. I really can't eat anything. Maybe for dinner."

"No, Lily. I am not turning into one of those girls who starve themselves because they think that they're fat when they're really underweight."

"Yes, Lily. I'm okay."

"No, Lily. I'm not hungry."

"No, Lily. Can you please leave me alone for a moment?"

"No, Lily. I haven't finished my homework."

"No, Lily. I haven't talked to Sirius since we broke up."

"Thank you, Lily. For cheering me up."

"No, Lily! Don't go! I'm not tired yet! No! I want to stay in the common room. No, Lily! I don't care if it's two o' clock already. No! Don't drag me up there. No!"

"No, Lily! The textbook is eviiiil! Take it away! Take it away! Take it awaaaay!"

"No, Lily. It's not blood. It is only red ink. No, I'm not lying. I bought it at Hogsmeade last year. Smell it. See, it's only ink. And you thought that I was stabbing my quill into my hand! _I only do that in private. Duh!_"

"Lily, do you hate me?"

"No, Lily. There's nothing that I haven't been telling you!"

"No, Lily! Don't roll up my sleeve!"

"No, Lily! Don't throw that snowball or I'll- Hey! I told you not to throw it!"

"Yes, Lily. I do know how much you absolutely love James and how much fun you had on your date yesterday."

"No, Lily. I am not going to miss Hogwarts."

"No, Lily. I am not sad that this is my last November day that I will ever be in Hogwarts unless I become a teacher."

That was how the rest of November passed by. She hated it so much that she would've been happier dead. There were a few times that a natural smile appeared on her face.

As November slowly turned into December, it became even colder. There was that one time in November that it snowed, but that was only because of a prank that Sirius and James had made up…

Although she no longer cried about not being with Sirius anymore, whenever she saw him, she felt pain inside. She had heard his voice plenty of times since that horrible day, but it was never directed to her. One time, she had asked Remus why Sirius was acting that way, and Remus had said, "I have no idea, Raine. He usually stays friends with all his ex-girlfriends, unless their break up involved a big argument, which doesn't usually happen, and didn't happen with you two."

"How would you know?"

"I'm one of Padfoot's best friends (other than Prongs, of course). Why wouldn't I know exactly how you broke up with him?"

"No idea… Well, thanks Rem'." She hugged him.

"Your welcome, Raine."

She smiled slightly, lying her head on his shoulder. "I'm sooo tired."

What she loved about being friends with Remus was that no matter what she said or did, it wouldn't seem flirty at all. They were just good friends and until he died, that would be all.

"Then go to sleep."

"No… Not until at least midnight…"

"Why not?"

"I have to wait until my room mates fall asleep."

"Why?"

"They'll start asking me questions."

"Oh…"

Raine's eyes slowly closed. She really hadn't wanted to fall asleep, but she was in a good mood that day. And she was tired…

"Good night." She could hear Remus say before she fell asleep.

O0o0O

"What homework do we have due tomorrow?" Raine asked Lily in a tired voice. She had come over to Lily's room to study, but by the time they found all their books, quills, parchment and ink, it was eleven o'clock.

Lily pulled out her assignment book and flipped a few pages, until she found the date and said, "Practice the spells on pages fifty-six to sixty-one for Transfiguration, write the History of Magic essay, fill out the ancient rune chart, and read two chapters in our Defensive Theory book."

"Done any of it yet?"

"The essay."

"I've done all of it except practicing the spells for Transfiguration."

"Well, you can do that until I'm done, then." Lily suggested.

"Okay, can I use your Transfiguration book? I lost it…"

O0o0O


	15. The Last Chapter To Be Named Later

O0o0O

_Tired of all the change,  
That happened because of him.  
Should I change back,  
Or stay on track,  
Which way will help me win?  
I'll change my hair back?  
To help me forget?  
To forget the past,  
Without a fret,_

The next morning before going to class, Raine dyed her hair back to black and told her roommates to call her Lorraine again. From then on, she wanted to be herself.

The only thing that she didn't like about having her old hair back was that she completely hated it. She had always thought that.

Lily was walking to class with James that morning, so she had to walk alone. She stared down straight down at the floor and paid no attention to people around her. Lorraine concentrated on the sound of her footsteps as she walked. It was like she was in a trance.

Somehow, she managed to get to class without bumping into anybody. She sat down on Lily's left just before the bell rang.

In the middle of class, Lily passed Lorraine a note, but she wasn't really in a mood to read it, so she put it into her pocket so she could read it later.

Later, during lunch, she took the note out of her pocket and read it:

_Tell me what secret you're keeping from me. I literally need to know. It's very important._

Why would it be important to know the secret? Of course, the secret was that she was a Death Eater that was plotting to kill her, and that wasn't something she would tell Lily, but would she get mad if she didn't tell? She probably wouldn't because… Well, it wasn't a very 'Lily Evans' thing to do.

It was one of the moments that she felt that she really needed some advice. But who would give advice to somebody about killing people without trying to arrest them after? Death eaters probably would, but she couldn't tell any other Death Eaters that she didn't want to kill them, or she would die…

Did she have any friends that she wasn't going to kill? Lorraine thought about it for a moment, and then the thought came to her. _Cameron!_

But would Cameron be mad that she had completely forgotten her? It was just like her to do that. Cameron was stubborn at times and sometimes had a short temper…

Lorraine scanned the Great Hall for Cameron, who wasn't there. _If I were Cameron, were would I be?_

"I gotta do something. I'll see you at Ancient Runes." She said to Lily before standing up and walking out of the Great Hall, and heading toward Gryffindor tower. The one place she could think of was her dormitory.

KNOCK! KNOCK!

No answer.

KNOCK! KNOCK!

There still wasn't an answer, so she sat down, her back against the door and closed her eyes, thinking. _Where would I be if I __were Cameron?_ Where…. "BLOODY HELL!"

Cameron had opened the door that she had been leaning on, making her fall back onto the floor.

Cameron laughed slightly. "Sorry. Didn't hear you knocking, _Raine_." She had said that word 'Raine' as if it were poisonous.

"I'm back to Lorraine now. The name came with the hair, which is gone now." She said, flipping her black hair.

"But your new friends came much **before** those, so they're still there, right?"

"You mad?" She asked in a quiet, small voice.

"You became popular and _forgot_ about me! My birthday was two weeks ago but _no_ you weren't there! If you were me, would _you_ be mad?" She practically screamed.

"Yes." She said even quieter.

"Why did you come up here, anyway?"

"Because I need your advice… And I'm really sorry, okay? I've had so much on my mind recently and I _had_ to be their friend. I had no choice!"

"Sure." Cameron said sarcastically.

"It's true."

"Then tell me why you _had_ to be their friend."

"I can't… Unless you agree to stop being mad at me, to forgive and forget.

The door slammed in her face, and she fell down the stairs.

O0o0O

Although she didn't show it, Lorraine was a wreck. Cameron was mad at her and she was still a bit upset whenever she saw Sirius. She still didn't know what to say to Lily, who was still waiting for a reply, but wasn't saying anything about it. What really got to her was all the homework she was getting. Apparently, the professors didn't think that they were going to pass any of their N.E.W.T.s, and didn't want to get stuck with them for another year.

She felt like she was drowning in cold poisonous water. She couldn't breath, and couldn't even open her mouth, or else she would die anyway.

_Cold, poisonous water,  
Should I try to breathe?  
Cause I'll die anyway.  
Or should I wait away,  
And postpone my death day?_

Everything seemed to pass by faster then ever. Classes were over in what seemed like a minute, and morning turned to night in what seemed like an hour. Most of her time was spent staring off into space and thinking the same old thoughts as usual.

Soon, it was the second Hogsmeade trip of the season. Lily was planning on spending most of the trip with James, so Remus and Peter decided to keep her company. Sirius was on a date with a sixth year Ravenclaw. She wasn't sure what her name was, or how she looked, because Sirius didn't tell that to Remus and Peter.

Lorraine tapped the window of the train boredly. "Are you staying for Christmas?" she asked the two boys without looking at them.

"Since Lily is, Prongs is too, which means that Padfoot is also staying, so Wormtail and I are too."

"I'm staying. I think that's why Lily's staying."

Remus laughed. "So you're the reason why five people are staying."

"I guess I am." She smiled.

She heard Remus taking out a book, but the train came to a halt, so he had to put it back. "What store do you want to go to first?" Peter asked cheerfully as he stood up.

Lorraine shrugged. "No idea."

"How about we just go down the road?" Remus said. "And stop at every store we need something from."

"Okay then."

The three seventh-years walked off of the train.

O0o0O

_I am extremely sorry it took me so long to put up these chapters, so I put up a lot, and one of Connect the Dots too…_


End file.
